Notice all the patterns of those who are "emotional abusers."
Brainwashing,
Diminishing self-confidence
Constantly testing your boundaries (forcing you to believe against your internal belief system)
silent treatment
passive agressive
disregard your feelings and needs
failure to validate a person
completely ignore you when you are speaking
disrespectful
manipulative
threatening and verbally abusing
gaslighting
The unfortunate thing is that we are ALL born with this "sin" problem in our heart! Our loved ones can also have these sin problems! Yes, when we were young we "pointed" at the funny man with the crooked hat and started to "laugh in our heart" at him. This is a "sin" problem. But it doesn't have to control us for the rest of our lives. People whom we think are trust-able could "ignore" the woman in the wheelchair and call her various names under one's breath.
Essentially the results of "emotional abuse" is the condition of having a "heavy heart" towards the people we are supposed to love, but the love is not coming back in return.
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Patterns of the emotional abuser are often in the "extremes" of political thinking. Far-right or Far-left. Given a scale should help identify the pattern of the "emotional abuser" 1-10 scale. 1 being more far-right, and 10 being more far-left.
-Racial issues/reverse racism issues
1. Only the people of my race have problems............................10. Only the people of the other race have problems.
(Jesus spent most time with those of his own "nationality/tribe" but he did acknowledge other surrounding nations and tribes, people among their own "tribe" have been known to persecute each other...ie. whites burn whites at the stake over religious views.....)
-Sexuality issues/Marriage choices
1. Marriage in one-man-one-woman relationships always work according to God's will/ single is best.............................10. People who have sexual impurity are nicer and more friendly than marriage between one man and one woman or religious single people
(Jesus addressed who was committing adultery/lust problems and what to do about infidelity problems, he never condemned polygyny as a practice, he had brotherly and sisterly love while addressing the corruption of Capernea as it was WORSE than Sodom and Gomorrah)
-Financial issues
1. Everyone who does things biblically will have enough provision in this life...........................10. Everyone is going to be in need of financial assistance and management
(Jesus addressed the man who thought he was good for obeying the commandments and told him to sell his goods, Jesus relied on the power of acknowledging the heavenly father to feed +/- 5000.....no money needed)
-Biblical law issues/Relationship with spiritual leaders
1. People should always strive to obey the law on their own strength/People need a paid pastor to find spiritual strength....................................10. People should do away with God's laws because it is too hard to keep/People don't need a elder/mentor or guide because they are expensive.
(Jesus said he was obedient to the law, every jot and tittle, Jesus never said it was good to put away the laws of God; A pastor or spiritual leader does not need to be paid as Jesus paid it all/ the multitude of counselors there is safety.)
-Family management issues/Extended family relationships
1. People will always have a family where the father and mother can mange everything for their children's needs 24/7..........................................................10. Fathers and Mothers are so imperfect that someone else needs to meet the needs of children.
(Jesus showed compassion on the young children, the disciples didn't think that they needed Jesus to fill in the gaps, Jesus addressed that the "hen should gather the chicks".....so there are evil people surrounding the children's hearts and minds; The Gospel mentions cousins here and there, James was Jesus' brother for example, John the Baptist was like a second cousin of sorts to Jesus.....they had to acknowledge each other to thrive spiritually speaking)
-Education issues
1. The earthly fathers can educate the children perfectly........................................10. Earthly fathers are so terrible and evil, they need the children taken away or even aborted so the children don't have to suffer in this life.
(Jesus said there were men who claimed linage to Abraham, but had evil pride in their hearts/ the fruits were corruptions, brainwashing and addictions eventually, Godly men seek to be redeemed, the repent of their sin and idolatry.....mere repentance is a sufficient example enough, unconditional love and suffering are educational tools as well. No child needs to be aborted because of the corruption in the father......the heavenly father is the best educational tool.)
-Health related issues
1. God is the ultimate provider of all healing in the body, there will never be a need for bandaides/natural healing always works.......................10. Everyone is going to suffer at all times in this life, the government needs to take care of all health related issues
(Jesus addressed the fact that there were going to be violent men and women, so others may get injured by other people, Jesus healed the "blind man," so his power existed then and it still exists today when people believe! The more belief in his healing power is practiced, the more ability comes to life.)
-Historical issues/Generational post-traumatic-stress disorder
1. The people who were a part of my faith practice/nationality never did anything wrong to other people because we are the "good people." Terrorism denial.........................................................10. The people who are a part of that faith practice/nationality have always done wrong to other people because they are the "bad people." Terrorism denial
(Jesus recalled what happened to the prophets of the bible! He recalled various historical events and why they were bad and what happened. He addressed the problem of Sodom and Gomorrah!)
-Child bearing and Raising issues
1. A woman can and should have more than enough children to bear and raise/all abortions are sin even ones where the unborn will not/did not survive past one week age outside the womb and woman's life is in danger.............................................10. If people don't encourage women to abort their children the social lives of the people in the future will suffer/remove all unwanted ethnic groups with undesired behavior by abortions.
(Jesus has ancestors that committed all sorts of "social crimes"(video link is not rated appropriate for young audience) including infidelity, Jesus was born out of wed-lock and Mary continued to have other children, the book of Job and other places mentions that some pregnancies do not last or continue to the end)
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Now knowing that emotional abuse does exist, doesn't mean that we should just "walk away from it," no we have to deal with it. The best way, in my understanding is to deal with it biblically! Yes, read through the Psalms and Proverbs. Outline each psalm and proverb and see what types of -bad things- the men did to the writers of the psalms! See the fruits of "evil" that brewed in the men and women in the proverbs!
Take a look at PSALM 22!!! Notice all the "emotional abuse" that Jesus went through!
To the chief Musician upon Aijeleth Shahar, A Psalm of David. My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me? why art thou so far from helping me, and from the words of my roaring? O my God, I cry in the daytime, but thou hearest not; and in the night season, and am not silent. But thou art holy, O thou that inhabitest the praises of Israel. Our fathers trusted in thee: they trusted, and thou didst deliver them. They cried unto thee, and were delivered: they trusted in thee, and were not confounded. But I am a worm, and no man; a reproach of men, and despised of the people. All they that see me laugh me to scorn: they shoot out the lip, they shake the head, saying, He trusted on the LORD that he would deliver him: let him deliver him, seeing he delighted in him. But thou art he that took me out of the womb: thou didst make me hope when I was upon my mother's breasts. I was cast upon thee from the womb: thou art my God from my mother's belly. Be not far from me; for trouble is near; for there is none to help. Many bulls have compassed me: strong bulls of Bashan have beset me round. They gaped upon me with their mouths, as a ravening and a roaring lion. I am poured out like water, and all my bones are out of joint: my heart is like wax; it is melted in the midst of my bowels. My strength is dried up like a potsherd; and my tongue cleaveth to my jaws; and thou hast brought me into the dust of death. For dogs have compassed me: the assembly of the wicked have inclosed me: they pierced my hands and my feet. I may tell all my bones: they look and stare upon me. They part my garments among them, and cast lots upon my vesture. But be not thou far from me, O LORD: O my strength, haste thee to help me. Deliver my soul from the sword; my darling from the power of the dog. Save me from the lion's mouth: for thou hast heard me from the horns of the unicorns. I will declare thy name unto my brethren: in the midst of the congregation will I praise thee. Ye that fear the LORD, praise him; all ye the seed of Jacob, glorify him; and fear him, all ye the seed of Israel. For he hath not despised nor abhorred the affliction of the afflicted; neither hath he hid his face from him; but when he cried unto him, he heard. My praise shall be of thee in the great congregation: I will pay my vows before them that fear him. The meek shall eat and be satisfied: they shall praise the LORD that seek him: your heart shall live for ever. All the ends of the world shall remember and turn unto the LORD: and all the kindreds of the nations shall worship before thee. For the kingdom is the LORD'S: and he is the governor among the nations. All they that be fat upon earth shall eat and worship: all they that go down to the dust shall bow before him: and none can keep alive his own soul. A seed shall serve him; it shall be accounted to the Lord for a generation. They shall come, and shall declare his righteousness unto a people that shall be born, that he hath done this.
(Psa 22:1-31)
He was: forsaken, no one heard him, laughed at, shot out their lips, scorned, reproached, despised, gaped upon, assembly of wicked men, afflicted etc etc.....
Look deeper into bible passages to get greater grasp on these issues. For example SAUL was a persecutor of the first Christians, including Stephen. The first Christians ACCEPTED their condition and fate before wicked men.
Now note: DO BEWARE of using the bible as a "political force." Brotherly love is non-political. It is non-sexual if you will. Jesus had unconditional brotherly and sisterly love (he loved Mary, Martha, and Lazarus too.....and John 3:16). It is a general over encompassing LOVE and compassion for those suffering in this world. LOVE covers a multitude of sins in our lives....... even LOVE for a terrorist! (Yes, the terrorist IS an emotional abuser.......people who deny terrorism problems in certain people groups are also emotional abusers.)
In summary, the "emotional abuser" has poor character, he lacks wisdom and doesn't seek understanding about his condition......from on high or otherwise. He or she believes he can control the "heart" of every man in one day. He or she believes he can tell the robin where to place the nest.
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